*keep on...keeping on*

{i've been sitting at my computer for a little over an hour...thinking of what to say. there isn't any way to sugar coat my feelings any more...i can't. i'm worn out, worn thin and my tears flow very easily these days. i'm tired of being "on hold". b and i are ready for our family to finally be complete. to know who our son really is. we want our son home and there is nothing we can do about it...but wait.
this Sunday, Oliver turns 18 months old. it breaks my heart to know that he's learning, talking, walking, and passing milestones, ones we will never get back.
i'm beyond tired of being in the process.....
next month..it will be THREE years. THREE...very...long...years.  
the worst part is waiting for this EP process to start. of all the years...this year they chose not to start the process at the beginning of the year and each Monday we hold our breaths waiting for the news that it finally started only to be told...maybe next week. we have no idea where we stand in the EP "line-up". we know we are not in the first batch but just knowing that the process of him coming home has started will give us that ray of hope we so desperately need right now.}
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